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Fix Yer Modem!

It's not insanely great if it doesn't just work.


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Try It

There is nothing wrong with the physical Apple modem; there is however something very wrong with the driver they've let out the door.

Echo requests every ten seconds? That's pinging - and no other driver anywhere does anything so batshit insane. Can you imagine what it would be like if Apple had Microsoft's 95% of the market (475 million computers) and they were all pinging their ISPs every ten seconds?

Yes Watson - it would be busier than AppleTalk!

And if the modem doesn't get a response four times in a row (the line can be clogged with a major FTP upload or download) the connection is pre-emptively broken.

Pure genius.

The Apple modem driver has a bad propensity for connecting at totally bizarre (and unacceptable) speeds as well - and then right out of the blue you're offline again.

Admittedly not every line is good; some contain a lot of noise; but no other driver goes on the rag for this, and with other drivers the connection remains functional and is never broken. No self-respecting driver writer anywhere would dream of implementing 'busy' AppleTalk-type connections like the modem driver writers working with Apple.

The following is a sort of 'poem' to the people responsible for these modem drivers. It will grow as time goes on. Notices about problems with the driver are legion and have been posted for years, and yet none of those responsible seem inclined to clean the act up. This 'poem' is dedicated to all the people in the world who have complained for years about the modem drivers and never got any response from Apple.

Wed May 21 13:06:36 2003 : Serial connection established.
Wed May 21 13:06:36 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Wed May 21 13:06:36 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Wed May 21 13:07:43 2003 : Terminating on signal 15.
Wed May 21 13:07:43 2003 : Connection terminated.
Wed May 21 13:07:43 2003 : Connect time 1.2 minutes.
Wed May 21 13:07:43 2003 : Sent 334 bytes, received 292 bytes.
Wed May 21 13:07:47 2003 : Serial link disconnected.

Thu May 22 12:53:38 2003 : Serial connection established.
Thu May 22 12:53:38 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Thu May 22 12:53:38 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Thu May 22 12:55:09 2003 : No response to 4 echo-requests
Thu May 22 12:55:09 2003 : Serial link appears to be disconnected.
Thu May 22 12:55:16 2003 : Connection terminated.
Thu May 22 12:55:16 2003 : Connect time 1.6 minutes.
Thu May 22 12:55:16 2003 : Sent 9311 bytes, received 32179 bytes.

Thu May 22 17:06:12 2003 : Serial connection established.
Thu May 22 17:06:12 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Thu May 22 17:06:12 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Thu May 22 17:06:45 2003 : Terminating on signal 15.
Thu May 22 17:06:51 2003 : Connection terminated.
Thu May 22 17:06:51 2003 : Connect time 0.6 minutes.
Thu May 22 17:06:51 2003 : Sent 3876 bytes, received 1958 bytes.
Thu May 22 17:07:08 2003 : Serial link disconnected.
Thu May 22 17:07:18 2003 : Terminating on signal 15.

Thu May 22 17:18:38 2003 : Serial connection established.
Thu May 22 17:18:38 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Thu May 22 17:18:38 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Thu May 22 17:20:59 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Thu May 22 17:20:59 2003 : Modem hangup
Thu May 22 17:20:59 2003 : Connection terminated.
Thu May 22 17:20:59 2003 : Connect time 2.4 minutes.
Thu May 22 17:20:59 2003 : Sent 349949 bytes, received 16209 bytes.

Sun May 25 20:12:09 2003 : Serial connection established.
Sun May 25 20:12:09 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Sun May 25 20:12:09 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Sun May 25 20:14:00 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Sun May 25 20:14:00 2003 : Modem hangup
Sun May 25 20:14:01 2003 : Connection terminated.
Sun May 25 20:14:01 2003 : Connect time 1.9 minutes.
Sun May 25 20:14:01 2003 : Sent 57754 bytes, received 35462 bytes.

Mon May 26 17:49:09 2003 : Serial connection established.
Mon May 26 17:49:09 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Mon May 26 17:49:09 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Tue May 27 20:41:40 2003 : Serial connection established.
Tue May 27 20:41:40 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Tue May 27 20:41:40 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Tue May 27 20:41:48 2003 : Terminating on signal 15.
Tue May 27 20:41:48 2003 : Connection terminated.
Tue May 27 20:41:48 2003 : Connect time 0.2 minutes.
Tue May 27 20:41:48 2003 : Sent 262 bytes, received 208 bytes.
Tue May 27 20:41:54 2003 : Serial link disconnected.

Wed May 28 01:21:15 2003 : Serial connection established.
Wed May 28 01:21:15 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Wed May 28 01:21:15 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Wed May 28 01:25:17 2003 : No response to 4 echo-requests
Wed May 28 01:25:17 2003 : Serial link appears to be disconnected.
Wed May 28 01:25:23 2003 : Connection terminated.
Wed May 28 01:25:23 2003 : Connect time 4.1 minutes.
Wed May 28 01:25:23 2003 : Sent 26572 bytes, received 30261 bytes.
Wed May 28 01:25:50 2003 : disconnect script failed

Sat Aug 30 13:41:36 2003 : Serial connection established.
Sat Aug 30 13:41:36 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Sat Aug 30 13:41:36 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Sat Aug 30 13:47:58 2003 : No response to 4 echo-requests
Sat Aug 30 13:47:58 2003 : Serial link appears to be disconnected.
Sat Aug 30 13:47:59 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Sat Aug 30 13:47:59 2003 : Modem hangup
Sat Aug 30 13:47:59 2003 : Connection terminated.
Sat Aug 30 13:47:59 2003 : Connect time 6.4 minutes.
Sat Aug 30 13:47:59 2003 : Sent 17489 bytes, received 11557 bytes.

Sun Aug 31 01:32:32 2003 : Serial connection established.
Sun Aug 31 01:32:32 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Sun Aug 31 01:32:32 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Sun Aug 31 01:33:12 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Sun Aug 31 01:33:12 2003 : Modem hangup
Sun Aug 31 01:33:12 2003 : Connection terminated.
Sun Aug 31 01:33:12 2003 : Connect time 0.7 minutes.
Sun Aug 31 01:33:12 2003 : Sent 16646 bytes, received 50233 bytes.

Sun Aug 31 01:34:23 2003 : Serial connection established.
Sun Aug 31 01:34:23 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Sun Aug 31 01:34:23 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Sun Aug 31 01:37:32 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Sun Aug 31 01:37:32 2003 : Modem hangup
Sun Aug 31 01:37:32 2003 : Connection terminated.
Sun Aug 31 01:37:32 2003 : Connect time 3.2 minutes.
Sun Aug 31 01:37:32 2003 : Sent 35379 bytes, received 116918 bytes.

Sun Aug 31 01:38:42 2003 : Serial connection established.
Sun Aug 31 01:38:42 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Sun Aug 31 01:38:42 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Sun Aug 31 01:46:43 2003 : No response to 4 echo-requests
Sun Aug 31 01:46:43 2003 : Serial link appears to be disconnected.
Sun Aug 31 01:46:45 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Sun Aug 31 01:46:45 2003 : Modem hangup
Sun Aug 31 01:46:45 2003 : Connection terminated.
Sun Aug 31 01:46:45 2003 : Connect time 8.1 minutes.
Sun Aug 31 01:46:45 2003 : Sent 68589 bytes, received 123531 bytes.

Sun Sep  7 02:32:26 2003 : Serial connection established.
Sun Sep  7 02:32:26 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Sun Sep  7 02:32:26 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Sun Sep  7 02:34:03 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Sun Sep  7 02:34:03 2003 : Modem hangup
Sun Sep  7 02:34:03 2003 : Connection terminated.
Sun Sep  7 02:34:03 2003 : Connect time 1.7 minutes.
Sun Sep  7 02:34:03 2003 : Sent 282912 bytes, received 17985 bytes.

Sun Sep  7 02:49:01 2003 : Serial connection established.
Sun Sep  7 02:49:01 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Sun Sep  7 02:49:01 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Sun Sep  7 02:50:30 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Sun Sep  7 02:50:30 2003 : Modem hangup
Sun Sep  7 02:50:30 2003 : Connection terminated.
Sun Sep  7 02:50:30 2003 : Connect time 1.5 minutes.
Sun Sep  7 02:50:30 2003 : Sent 218301 bytes, received 16696 bytes.

Sun Sep  7 21:03:13 2003 : Serial connection established.
Sun Sep  7 21:03:13 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Sun Sep  7 21:03:14 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Sun Sep  7 21:07:48 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Sun Sep  7 21:07:48 2003 : Modem hangup
Sun Sep  7 21:07:48 2003 : Connection terminated.
Sun Sep  7 21:07:48 2003 : Connect time 4.6 minutes.
Sun Sep  7 21:07:48 2003 : Sent 216784 bytes, received 40785 bytes.

Sun Sep 14 15:02:30 2003 : Serial connection established.
Sun Sep 14 15:02:30 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Sun Sep 14 15:02:30 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Sun Sep 14 15:04:23 2003 : Terminating on signal 15.
Sun Sep 14 15:04:24 2003 : Connection terminated.
Sun Sep 14 15:04:24 2003 : Connect time 1.9 minutes.
Sun Sep 14 15:04:24 2003 : Sent 49288 bytes, received 171687 bytes.
Sun Sep 14 15:04:27 2003 : Serial link disconnected.

Sun Sep 14 15:05:06 2003 : Serial connection established.
Sun Sep 14 15:05:06 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Sun Sep 14 15:05:06 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Sun Sep 14 15:06:46 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Sun Sep 14 15:06:46 2003 : Modem hangup
Sun Sep 14 15:06:46 2003 : Connection terminated.
Sun Sep 14 15:06:46 2003 : Connect time 1.7 minutes.
Sun Sep 14 15:06:46 2003 : Sent 78631 bytes, received 229218 bytes.

Tue Sep 23 04:26:55 2003 : Serial connection established.
Tue Sep 23 04:26:55 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Tue Sep 23 04:26:55 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Tue Sep 23 04:27:24 2003 : IPCP terminated by peer
Tue Sep 23 04:27:25 2003 : LCP terminated by peer
Tue Sep 23 04:27:28 2003 : Connection terminated.
Tue Sep 23 04:27:28 2003 : Connect time 0.5 minutes.
Tue Sep 23 04:27:28 2003 : Sent 1844 bytes, received 567 bytes.
Tue Sep 23 04:27:28 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Tue Sep 23 04:27:28 2003 : Modem hangup
Tue Sep 23 04:27:28 2003 : Connection terminated.

Tue Sep 23 11:22:52 2003 : Serial connection established.
Tue Sep 23 11:22:52 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Tue Sep 23 11:22:52 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Tue Sep 23 11:26:14 2003 : Terminating on signal 15.
Tue Sep 23 11:26:15 2003 : Connection terminated.
Tue Sep 23 11:26:15 2003 : Connect time 3.4 minutes.
Tue Sep 23 11:26:15 2003 : Sent 7516 bytes, received 8678 bytes.
Tue Sep 23 11:26:24 2003 : Serial link disconnected.

Wed Sep 24 00:39:23 2003 : Serial connection established.
Wed Sep 24 00:39:23 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Wed Sep 24 00:39:23 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Wed Sep 24 00:42:25 2003 : Terminating on signal 15.
Wed Sep 24 00:42:26 2003 : Connection terminated.
Wed Sep 24 00:42:26 2003 : Connect time 3.1 minutes.
Wed Sep 24 00:42:26 2003 : Sent 4771 bytes, received 2974 bytes.
Wed Sep 24 00:42:30 2003 : Serial link disconnected.

Thu Sep 25 09:20:52 2003 : Serial connection established.
Thu Sep 25 09:20:52 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Thu Sep 25 09:20:52 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Thu Sep 25 09:21:58 2003 : Terminating on signal 15.
Thu Sep 25 09:21:59 2003 : Connection terminated.
Thu Sep 25 09:21:59 2003 : Connect time 1.1 minutes.
Thu Sep 25 09:21:59 2003 : Sent 5384 bytes, received 6079 bytes.
Thu Sep 25 09:22:03 2003 : Serial link disconnected.

Thu Sep 25 11:21:33 2003 : Serial connection established.
Thu Sep 25 11:21:33 2003 : Using interface ppp0
Thu Sep 25 11:21:33 2003 : Connect: ppp0 <--> /dev/cu.modem
Thu Sep 25 11:26:00 2003 : Hangup (SIGHUP)
Thu Sep 25 11:26:00 2003 : Modem hangup
Thu Sep 25 11:26:01 2003 : Connection terminated.
Thu Sep 25 11:26:01 2003 : Connect time 4.5 minutes.
Thu Sep 25 11:26:01 2003 : Sent 153384 bytes, received 321378 bytes.
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