Your Majesty

Her Majesty's a pretty nice girl but she doesn't have a lot to say
Her Majesty's a pretty nice girl but she changes from day to day
I wanna tell her that I love her a lot but I gotta get a belly full of wine
Her Majesty's a pretty nice girl, someday I'm gonna make her mine
 - Sir Paul McCartney

Get It Try It

To:
HRH Elizabeth
Buckingham Palace
London UK

From:
RIXSTEP.COM

Your Majesty,

May we first mention how stunning You look in Your photographs with William Gates. Stunning, absolutely stunning - not a day over thirty.

And Mr Gates appears to be wearing a very nice suit.

Your actions have inspired us all: we see a re-emergence of the Commonwealth, a 'Virtual Commonwealth' if You will, where people from all walks of life and all nations are recognised for their contributions to Mankind and Your Greater Glory.

In that vein we should like to humbly submit to Your Majesty a short list of additional nominees for Virtual Knighthood.

Sincerely,

In alphabetical order:

Ask Aak, Victoria Adams, Nee Alavar, Sally Albright, Jess Allashane, Stass Allie, Beverley Allitt, Per Almqvist, Mas Amedda, Scott Amedure, Padmé Naberrie Amidala, Idi Amin Dada Oumee, Mari Amithest, Wedge Antilles, Marie Antoinette, Passel Argente, Nicholaus Arson, John Ashcroft, Rick Astley, Fema Baab, Hermione Bagwa, Scott Baio, Jim Bakker, Tammy Faye Bakker Messner, Daniel Barbosa, Flash the Basset Hound, Erzébet Báthory, Fulgencio Batista y Zaldívar, Jim Beam, Fozzie Bear, Richard Beau, David Beckham, Thug Behram, Chall Bekan, Marc Bell, Mary Bell, Rene Belloq, Estelle Bennett, Veronica Bennett, William Bennett, Freddie Benson, Sture Bergwall, Lavrenty Pavlovich Beria, David Berkowitz, Paul Bernardo, Kenneth Bianchi, Sio Bibble, Ernest Bilko, Depa Billaba, Jar Jar Binks, Big Bird, Robert Black, Cherie Blair, Jerrol Blendin, Captain Bligh, Wolf Blitzer, Ernst Stavro Blofeld, Elwood Blues, Jake Blues, Doda Bodonawieedo, Ivan Boesky, Cherie Booth, John Wilkes Booth, Dusty Bottoms, Ian Brady, Patty Bouvier, Selma Bouvier, Bana Breemu, Adam Bricker, Kent Brockman, David Brooks, Kyle Broslofski, Divine Brown, Martin Bryant, Patrick Joseph Buchanan, Angelo Buono Jr, Clem Burke, Harry Burns, Montgomery Burns, JK Burtola, Wol Cabbashite, Mon Calamarie, Trey Callum, Lando Calrissian, Vigilante Carlstroem, Asa Griggs Candler, Eric Cartman, Nicolae Ceauşescu, Lao Che, Dick Cheney, Chao-Li Chi, Andrei Romanovich Chikatilo, John Childs, Shann Childsen, John Christie, Yoo Young-Chul, Constance Yu-Hwa Chung, Foxy Cleopatra, Roscoe P Coltrane, Douglas Glenn Colvin, Ronet Coorr, Swilla Corey, Vito Corleone, Dean Corll, Juan Corona, Mary Ann Cotton, Gladys the Cow, Wile E Coyote, Thomas Neill Cream, Peter Criscoula, Arvel Crynyd, John Cummings, Barquin D'an, Jeffrey Dahmer, Jean Claude van Damme, Chris Dangerous, Jack Daniels, Giddean Danu, Cooter Davenport, Doris Day, Lucky Day, Karl Denke, Bren Derlin, Albert DeSalvo, Matt Destruction, Cameron Diaz, P Diddy, Peter George Dinsdale, Lou Dobbs, Lott Dod, Daultay Dofine, Bob the Dog, Scooby Doo, Scrappy Doo, Tundra Dowmeia, Cin Drallig, Nancy Drew, Bo Duke, Coy Duke, Daisy Duke, James Buchanan Duke, Jesse Duke, Luke Duke, Mortimer Duke, Randolph Duke, Vance Duke, Kirsten Dunst, Marc Dutroux, François Duvalier, Bernie Ebbers, Mister Ed, Maxwell Edison, Chi Eekway, Franck Eggelhoffer, Albert Eichmann, Willem van Eijk, Glennon Engleman, Thomas Erdelyi, John Erlichman, Kenneth Erskine, Kevin Eubanks, Ashley Covington Evans, Sun Fac, Toryn Farr, Hrchek Kal Fas, Sai'torr Kal Fas, Guy Fawkes, Basil Fawlty, Sybil Fawlty, Kevin Federline, José Feliciano, Boba Fett, Albert Fish, Kit Fitso, Dan Fixx, Maude Flanders, Ned Flanders, Rod Flanders, Todd Flanders, Nik Fo, Arthur Fonzarelli, Bib Fortuna, Michel Fourniret, Samantha Fox, Francisco Paulino Hermenegildo Teódulo Franco y Bahamonde Salgado Pardo de Andrade, Ace Frehley, Laila Freivalds, Kermit the Frog, Elmer Fudd, Caril Ann Fugate, John Wayne Gacy, Adi Gallia, Carlo Gambino, Ursula Gatsby, Ed Gein, Ann Gella, Tann Gella, Wanda Gershwitz, Happy Gilmore, Del Goren, Gesche Gottfried, Victoria Gotti, Ginger Grant, Gaear Grimsrud, Karl Grossmann, Jonas Grumby, Michael James Vijencio Gubitosi, Barney Gumble, Forrest Gump, Nute Gunray, Comic Book Guy, Josef Göbbels, Herman Göring, Rune Haako, Fritz Haarmann, Jessica Hahn, John George Haigh, Robert Haldeman, Paige Halliwell, Phoebe Halliwell, Piper Halliwell, John Hammond, Wu Han, David Michael Hasselhoff, Christie Hefner, Hugh Hefner, Elmer Wayne Henley, Rudolph Hess, Michael Hfuhruhurr, San Hill, Paris Hilton, Heinrich Himmler, Myra Hindley, Mister Hinkie, Roy Hinkley Jr, Mitchell Hodgemeyer, Cletus Hogg, Jefferson Davis Hogg, HH Holmes, Erich Honecker, Karla Homolka, J Edgar Hoover, Milhouse Van Houten, Tey How, Eunice Wentworth Howell, Thurston Howell III, Rock Hudson, Attila the Hun, Saddam Hussein, Lionel Hutz, Jeffrey Hyman, Vanilla Ice, Javed Iqbal, Colin Ireland, Janet Jackson, Michael Jackson, Pig Eye Jackson, Tigran Jamiro, Moff Jerjerrod, Dexter Jettster, Qui-Gon Jinn, David Jones (UK), Jimbo Jones, Chiang Kai-shek, Kao Kan, Thomas Kazansky, Ned Kelly, Edmund Kemper, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Tawss Khaa, Gengis Khan, Kublai Khan, Ayatollah Khomeini, Lemmy Kilmister, Rya Kirsch, Bela Kiss, Henry Kissinger, Derek Klivian, Krusty the Klown, Sergio Knight, Agen Kolar, Plo Koon, Lam Kor-Wan, Eeth Koth, Edna Krabappel, William Kristol, Ray Kroc, Joachim Georg Kroll, Peter Kürten, Henri Désiré Landru, Garouf Lafoe, Leonard Lake, Rikki Lake, Chattar Lal, Lorenzo Lamas, Linus Larrabee, Cliegg Lars, Owen Lars, Joakim Larsson, George Lazenby, Archibald Leach, Portia Leach, Wendy Leach, Derrick Todd Lee, Tommy Lee, Nabrun Leids, Jay Leno, Eddie Leonski, Poggle the Lesser, Lewis Libby, Gordon Liddy, Rush Limbaugh, Eddie Leonski, Jennifer Lopez, Pedro Lopez, Émile Louis, Mike Love, Helen Lovejoy, Henry Lee Lucas, Susan Lucci, Bruno Ludke, Jerry Lundegaard, Michael Lupo, Lex Luthor, Patrick Mackay, Crix Madine, Shu Mai, Victor Maitland, Charles Manson, Marla Maples, Zdzislaw Marchwicki, Angelo Mariani, Mick Mars, Stan Marsh, Marshall Bruce Mathers III, Darth Maul, Robert Mawdsley, Troy McClure, Droopy McCool, Kenny McCormick, Jack McCoy, Julie McCoy, Ronald McDonald, Jerome McElroy, Tion Medon, Robert Gordon Menzies again, Mrs Merton, Melinda Messenger, Ivan Milat, Michael Milken, Dannii Minogue, Kylie Minogue, Lunae Minx, John Mitchell, Tsutomu Miyazaki, Aks Moe, Hans Moleman, Peter Moore, Sly Moore, Bullwinkle the Moose, Philip Morris, Jim Morrison, Marion Robert Morrison, Mon Mothma, Herman Mudgett, Herbert Mullin, Nelson Muntz, Rupert Murdoch, Jobal Naberrie, Pooja Naberrie, Ruwee Naberrie, Ryoo Naberrie, Sola Naberrie, Boss Nass, Ned Nederlander, Vince Neil, Donald Neilson, Earle Nelson, Charles Ng, Jonas Nightengale, Dennis Nilsen, Richard Nixon, Manuel Antonio Noriega Moreno, Oliver North, Jocasta Nu, Po Nudo, Nien Nunb, Barriss Offee, Ric Olié, Jamie Oliver, Ashley Olsen, Clifford Olsen, Jimmy Olsen, Mary-Kate Olsen, Anatoly Onoprienko, Bail Organa, Leia Organa, William James O'Reilly Jr, Aimee Osbourne, Jack Osbourne, John Michael Osbourne, Kelly Osbourne, Sharon Osbourne, Lee Harvey Oswald, Ister Paddie, The Microsoft Paperclip, Peter Parker, Camilla Parker-Bowles, Walter Peck, James Pemberton, Francisco de Assis Pereira, Richard Perle, Henri Philippe Pétain, Marcel Petiot, Even Piell, Miss Piggy, Ken Pile, Augustin Pinochet, Jesse Pomeroy, Yarael Poof, Maurice Richard Povich, Martin Prince, Dorothea Puente, Djas Puhr, Dan Quayle, Thomas Quick, Jessica Rabbit, Roger Rabbit, Gilles de Rais, Dak Ralter, Mola Ram, Richard Ramirez, Paul Ramon, C-Jay Ramone, Dee Dee Ramone, Elvis Ramone, Joey Ramone, Johnny Ramone, Marky Ramone, Richie Ramone, Tommy Ramone, Oppo Rancisis, Terry Hartford Ranson, Dan Rather, Greg Reardon, Rigby Reardon, Max Rebo, Lou Reed, Vera Renczi, Angel Maturino Resendiz, Tamizander Rey, Condoleeza Rice, Gary Ridgway, Carlist Rieekan, Sun Rit, La Vache Qui Rit, Geraldo Rivera, Bob Roberts, Pat Robertson, John Edward Robinson, Kid Rock, Danny Rolling, Axl Rose, Samantha Ross, Johnny Rotten, Mark Rowntree, Donald Rumsfeld, Rycar Ryjerd, Mona Sahlin, Harland Sanders, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Wilhelmina Scott, Orin Scrivello, John Sculley, Aayla Secura, Zev Senesca, Wyron Serper, Abdul Latif Sharif, Sebastian Shaw, Arthur Shawcross, Polly Shearman, Brooke Shields, Harold Frederick Shipman, Carl Showalter, Darth Sidious, Gene Simmons, Richard Simmons, Aurra Sing, Sirhan Sirhan, Leesub Sirln, Nikki Sixx, Agnes Skinner, Elan Sleazebaggano, Anna Nicole Smith, Burl Smith, Alan Smithee, Waylon Smithers, Sy Snootles, Charles Sobhraj, (Captain) Jack Sparrow, Britney Spears, Harvey Phillip Spector, Gerald Norman Springer, Rocky the (Flying) Squirrel, Charles Starkweather, Eric Stavros, Janina Stranski, Heinrich Strasser, Enos Strate, Franz Josef Strauss, John Straffen, Milo Stubing, Merrill Stubing, Marshall Stubing, Vicki Stubing, Lama Su, Mary Ann Summers, Peter Sutcliffe, Jimmy Swaggart, Bultar Swan, Moe Szyslak, Orn Free Taa, Nedra Talley, Wat Tambor, Terr Taneel, Quentin Tarantino, Moff Tarkin, Joey Tempest, Simon Templar, Wendy Testeberger, Dave Thomas, Shaak Ti, Abitha Tibbs, Saesee Tiin, Senni Tonnika, Brea Tonnika, Otis Toole, Toonbuck Toora, Jane Toppan, Pol Treidum, Joey Tribbiani, Darth Tyranus, Luminara Unduli, Darth Vader, Brian Valentine, Finis Valorum, Milli Vanilli, Sid Vicious, Christopher John Ward, Isaac Washington, Coral Eugene Watts, Bruce Wayne, John Wayne, Taun We, Zam Wesell, Fred West, Otto West, Rose West, Snidely Whiplash, Perry White, Beru Whitesun, Ralph Wiggum, Wayne Williams, Charles Windsor, Mace Windu, Gary Winnick, Chaim Witz, Rainer Wolfcastle, Paul Wolfowitz, Ed Wood, Aileen Wuornos, Ree Yees, Graham Young, Josef Yughashvili, Fang Zar, Robert Zimmerman, Лаврeнтий Пaвлович Бeрия, Анатолій Онопрієнко, Андрeй Ромaнович Чикатйло, 유영철, 宗毓華, and 宮崎勤. To name but a select few.

As well as the entire Brady family: Michael, Carol, Marcia, Jan, Cynthia, Gregory, Peter, Robert, and maid Alice; the entire Bundy family: Al, Peggy, Kelly, Bud, and Ted; the entire Duck family: Daisy, Dewey, Donald, Huey, and Louie; and the entire Simpson family: Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa, Ashlee, and Jessica.