The Result

Maybe it's better if we're alone in the Universe™.

Get It Try It

It's a weird feeling in the middle of the night to read the news and realise that the few rays of hope for this world are being diffused by more idiocy. It's probably a good thing if despite all it turns out there's no 'intelligent' life on any other planet in the Universe™ because if what's happening here is any indication then that species known as homo sapiens is mostly a bad joke.

Looking at the array of clowns lining the columns of the media sites is ghastly. There are so many idiots and they're all getting the headlines. Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Josef Ratzinger, celebrities from dance contests - you'd think there were no outstanding issues with life on the earth and everybody was hunky-dory. No starvation, no injustice, no cruelty, and no wars.

Elephant Man says he wants to keep the middle east occupied for another hundred years. Sounds like the Fifth Reich.

Right about the time many of us were growing up and saw Windows 3 for the first time we also heard about someone known as HW Bush. And people everywhere rallied around him as the greatest international alliance ever assembled to oust an intruder from a neighbouring country. Nobody wanted war or violence but they were still encouraged by the good will they saw.

And then when it was over they heard the same HW give a speech in the UN about the end to war, about how UN troops would in the future only be used to help peoples in catastrophic areas, help them with reconstruction, fighting famines and other bad things. It sounded great. Glasses were raised in toast.

Then the same HW appeared on television screens with his wife and many people gawked. 'Do those two people actually have sex?' That was one very candid question. Then another. 'Do they have any children?' And the general consensus was if they had children then those children would be freaks - both mentally and physically.

Cut to the present and 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Four years ago the US Democratic party dished up Long Face to battle the neocons. The outcome was expected. Before the campaign nobody knew who Long Face was; today they've already forgot. The Democrats take a candidate out of nowhere and then in a few short months it's back to nowhere again.

Talk about a party without a vision.

Change: one candidate today on the Democrat side talks about change. Actually that's a bit unfair. He doesn't talk about change - he just keeps repeating the word. Change. Change. CHANGE. And isn't it amazing how a one word campaign catches on?

What we in other countries of the west must keep in mind is that voters in other countries are not necessarily as clued in, well educated, and serious as we are. We have to keep in mind that the US is not isolated by oceans alone. If Iranian and Iraqi ex-pats describe their area of the world as 'back in the middle ages' the US can't be far ahead.

No joke: there's a clip on YouTube where one of these crackpots 'proves' that Darwin is all wrong with a jar of peanut butter. It's no joke. The level of ignorance and brainwashing is staggering. To think there are people like that who actually live and breathe the same air and inhabit the same planet as we do - and yes connect to the same Internet - is incomprehensible. They're not part of the real world. And the people of the real world don't want them around.

Things that happen in the US affect everyone. To a great extent things that happen anywhere in this world affect everyone in this world. But if the award for the most annoying country of all time were to be announced in these wee hours the United States would win hands down.

The US has only one metropolitan area which is at all sane and reasonably in tune with others. And that's New York City. It's not the same as Europe but it's as close as it gets. Leave the airport and venture out onto a highway in any direction and you're on your own, boy. And things are going to get really strange really fast.

Whether it's the 'continental breakfasts' that consist of powdered juice with greasy danishes or the incessant hamburger restaurants or the absolute dearth of any substantial cuisine at least half a metre away from junk food; whether it's the jaw dropping obesity of those people; whether it's their obsession with bud and prescription drugs; whether it's their incessant complaining about the costs of health care; whether it's how they kiss their own shackles and work harder and longer than people in any other country to a productivity significantly lower than in any other country; whether it's their weird belief they're 'number one' when today all they're number one at is believing they're number one; whether it's the alarming low level of education and literacy; whether it's seeing signs in the supermarkets that say '1 for $1, 2 for $2.50' and seeing people actually pick things up in pairs because they think they're saving money and can't do the simple math of multiplying 1 times 2...

These people will elect a new leader.

These people who still believe Saddam Hussein was behind the 911 attacks. These people who say things like 'we don't care what country they're from - BOMB THEM ALL!' It's scary. On the one hand you have this enormous potential for destruction. Then you have an incredibly mobilised and militarised population.

In other countries people raise flags on national holidays. Some countries even had to be coaxed into having national holidays. Often it could be pressure from worker groups to have another holiday period. But in the US people raise their flags every day. We're the land of the free. We're protecting freedom around the world. And so forth. And then of course a closet full of Smith, Wesson, Remington, and Stinger.

Gotta have that too. And then along happens Columbine. And what do they do? Oh we keep our ammunition and weapons separately. And we lock those compartments. And in Switzerland everybody has a weapon. And then they talk like this for a few weeks until something else happens and they can just simply plain forget everything.

Reason dictates that when you have guns and you have looney tunes in the same place bad things are going to happen. And the US has more guns and looney tunes in the same place - even per square mile - than anywhere else. No wonder things turn out as they do.

Right now the world is divided as never before. It's amazing to see these fanatics turn the outpouring of sympathy after 911 and totally blow it. What's more amazing is realising they don't really care what they've done and nothing's going to stop them now either.

From a balanced budget to a nine trillion dollar deficit, borrowing money from China to buy oil, fifty million uninsured. And we're not talking about social insurance - we're talking about medical insurance. As in you get your bills paid and you get the health care you need. Try to talk to them about not losing your income when you're sick and their eyes will glaze over.

Truly the people of the US are stuck back in the middle ages. But they have more guns than the other countries in the middle east.

Watching the fascists on NBC and Fox bash women - and now Hillary - is a treat. Most of these 'men' couldn't get laid if they had to. Unless they were paying for it. And most of them probably are. Calling them endemically despicable would be too mild. Woman is the nigger of the world according to a former Beatle who was killed on the streets of the US by a US born and bred idiot with a US manufactured gun. But nigger isn't the woman of the world. You can't say things about blacks. Can you even call them blacks anymore? Are they negroes? Or African Americans? Or Afro-Americans? Or Africans?

The retarded: they're not retarded anymore. They're developmentally something or other. It's derogatory to call them retarded. What nonsense. 'Retarded' is a bloody word. Like fuck shit piss cock cunt. Just a word. In ten years they'll get tired of hearing 'developmentally ___' and they'll go back to calling them retarded again.

But in the heat of the current campaign it's not just about words. It's about trying to get viewers/listeners/readers to assimilate a view very accessible in the US: women are for shit. They may be good for baking cookies or doing the wash or spreading their legs but listen to what they say? Take them seriously? You must be kidding.

Women who go out and get serious degrees. From places like Radcliffe. And Yale. And then marry. And to hell with their degrees. Now they're expected to get overjoyed they get a fucking washing machine for their birthday. Who's kidding who?

You literally have to travel to Afghanistan to see such oppression of women. And worse: at least the women in Afghanistan are fighting it. In the US they're loving it.

This again is no joke: in the 1992 US election campaign women in the US objected to Hillary Rodham Clinton campaigning with her husband. They thought she should stay at home and bake cookies. No joke.

Sounds like a Barbara Bush or a Laura Bush but not a Hillary Clinton. And Hillary's daughter is neither ugly nor stupid.

So here we have a country easily the most annoying of all time about to choose a new leader to once again annoy everyone even more than before, spread the goodwill of Rambo, Coke, and KFC around the world - and the one thing you'd hope for is that they choose wisely.

- But they can't even think straight, much less type or spell coherently. As one poster at Digg wrote recently: 'that was well formulated and had no spelling or grammatical errors - clearly the author can't be from here'.

- They practice something called 'PC'. They're going to be very careful about what they say. And turn around and are the most insulting race living on the Atlantic Ocean. You can't express yourself freely in the US: people are always half a breath away from an outright fight. All the scraps - no sensible discussion.

- Candidates win and lose points not on their qualifications or their plans but on innuendoes. Kerry was victimised by Swift boats. And so forth. People will not choose candidates on rational grounds because they have neither the time nor the intelligence to do so. They want to watch Lost on the telly - not listen to political issues. And those politicians use such big words anyway.

No joke: one of the proprietors of this site was in a bank in the US trying to cash a cheque from a European bank. The office manager couldn't figure out what currency was being used. And when she had it explained to her said 'please use shorter words shorter than three syllables if you want me to keep up'. Where else would this be possible?

Arms races. Stealth bombers. Troops all over the world. Campbells soups and corn dogs. People who don't know there's not a language called 'Mexican'. People who haven't seen anything, have no clue about anything, and are unwittingly funding the biggest military force in human history. Who work their butts off for less pay and fewer paid holidays with no health insurance - who get royally screwed and lied to left and right by a power elite who fully understand how dumb and duped they are - and what's the result?

The result is feeling restless. Getting up in the middle of the night and reading the news headlines. And realising it's better if there isn't more life like this on other planets. With these astoundingly dangerous, stupid, and selfish people it's already bad enough.