Rice & Strickland

The idiots are looking for scapegoats.

Get It Try It

Jared Ilovar, a $10.50/hour interim employee for the US state of Ohio, ended his workday by (according to specific instructions from his superiors) taking home sensitive backup data on all 64,467 Ohio state employees to his home in Hilliard outside of Columbus.

He didn't lock the car. He left the data in the car.

Ilovar performed this 'security procedure' on a regular basis, rotating with others. This 'security procedure' has been in regular use for the past five years.

OPD ≡ OPM

Banks know how to do this thing. If they weren't instinctively careful they'd be forced. Banks generally know how to handle 'OPM' - 'other people's money' - but it seems almost no one knows how to handle 'OPD' - 'other people's data'. And today they're fully equivalent.

Jared Ilovar is but the tip of an ugly iceberg. Jared made a bit of a mistake but considering the demented attitude in place in his organisation it's understandable he doesn't take 'OPD' any more seriously than his superiors.

This isn't about technological expertise - this is about having a brain. Or more specifically as the overall topic of The Technological: about those who totally lack one.

Unsurprisingly the state workers unions are up in arms. Somehow - although they ostensibly lack the technological expertise to assess the situation - they understand it far better than Jared's superiors.

Again to clarify: Jared didn't steal any data; Jared didn't misappropriate data; he put data in his bloody car and drove home with it because he was told to.

Neither was he instructed to fortify his dwelling with three inch thick steel walls, special fire and burglar alarms, Stinger missiles, mines in his flower beds - and he wasn't told to never leave home once he'd brought the data to safety.

Jared wasn't told 'NO YOU MAY NOT GO OUT TAKE IN A MOVIE OR EAT A PIZZA'. He wasn't given special training in protecting the data against intruders. He had no specific security measures in his home to guard against robbers, burglars, or thieves.

They just gave him the bloody tape. A backup tape. That was their way of making sure their data on 64,467 Ohio state employees was secure.

Pure genius.

Who Needs More Scapegoats?

Finding and outing the idiot(s) responsible for this amazing scheme is going to be nigh on impossible. Apparatchiks like this might be low in the Brains & Skills Department but when it comes to guarding their backsides they're something Darwin would be proud of.

Yet with idiots like Dawn Rice and governor Ted Strickland showing off their talent for 'foot in mouth' there's really no need.

Dawn Rice is first.

I think it's not that big of a deal. The person who stole it would really have to know what he's doing.

Ohio governor Ted Strickland is next.

I don't mean to alarm people unnecessarily. There's no reason to believe a breach of information has occurred.

That 'breach of information' could theoretically be a 'typo' even though it's found in at least two accounts of the incident online but odds are it's just Ted doing his thing.

How do you 'breach' 'information', Ted? Did you mean 'breach of intelligence'? That would be far more understandable.

Jared Ilovar is next and winds it up.

Jared is very scared. Jared is valuing his friends above all else.

Rice and Strickland are going to be looking for a scapegoat. Jared already knows who that is.