Business & Freak

What did they see?

Mr Business sits waiting in Moscone, arms crossed on chest. No wireless, no laptop, no iPod, no nothing. He doesn't even own an iPod and has no plans to buy one.

Next to him sits Mr Freak. He's got everything. He's going to turn off his iPod any second now when Steve comes on stage.

He's got a 17 inch PowerBook open and he's got his wireless blasting and he's updating live to his blog.

09:07 AM - The lights go down and Steve takes the stage. He starts doing a retail update. Mr Business' wheels start turning, calculating.

09:12 AM - Apple sold 14 million iPods in the last quarter. Freak looks at Business. Business shrugs. That's one hundred per minute, Freak whispers to him, repeating what Steve just said onstage. Business is not impressed.

09:14 AM - Apple have sold over 850 million songs. Business does not budge and Freak doesn't provoke him.

09:15 AM - The Rose Bowl is now the #1 video on iTunes. Business hides a yawn.

09:16 AM - Video of Belushi in Samurai delicatessen, then the Blues Brothers. Business notes the cheers but otherwise is unmoved. The iPod FM tuner. Freak is thinking 'boy this guy is hard - why did I have to get to sit next to him?'

09:18 AM - Chrysler update. 40% of the new models will have iPod integration. Business uncrosses and crosses his arms on his chest, looks up briefly at the ceiling, slouches a bit in his seat.

09:19 AM - Wynton Marsalis. Business casts Freak a cruel look. That's music but this is Macworld. Business looks lightly phased. Aperture. Business looks like he's going to lose his temper.

09:25 AM - Steve talking about new widgets. Freak listens attentively while Business looks like he's turning into a psychopathic killer. A new Google widget so you don't have to go to Safari. Business lets out an audible sigh. New Tiger today with all the new widgets. Freak thinks he sees Business sticking out his tongue.

09:29 AM - 1-Click effects.

09:30 AM - Photocasting. Podcasting for photos. 'Wouldn't it be great if every time I updated a photo album, people subscribed to it would get the latest photos?' Yeah they'd be fucking flabbergasted, Business mumbles. Or so Freak thinks he heard.

09:40 AM - iMovie. Business sighs deeply. Obviously this guy is restless, thinks Freak who is starting to resent the guy.

09:45 AM - iDVD with wide screen capabilities. Freak drools. Business casts a meaningful glance at him.

09:54 AM - Increasingly a lot of us want to build a web site. Freak thinks he hears Business mutter 'oh brother' under his breath. iWeb? iWeb? Freak sees Business forming the word over and over with his lips as if he's asking a question. iWeb sounds cool, thinks Freak. Even if it's a bit recursive. Business has his head in his hand, his eyes covered. He shakes his head slowly from side to side.

10:01 AM - Steve makes a blog. Business shuffles in his seat.

10:07 AM - We're shifting to Intel processors.

10:10 AM - Clean room suit walks out with helmet on. It's Paul Otellini. We're all ready - are you ready? Yeah we're ready - are you ready? And it's not a laptop but an iMac. Business looks faintly interested. Freak is audibly disappointed.

10:14 AM - The iMac will have the same price as before. Freak is groaning. Business is laughing at him under his breath. Each of the dual cores are faster than the G5. Yeah, and a lawnmower is faster than a Lear Jet, mumbles Business.

10:17 AM - Entire keynote is on 10.4.2 for Intel. Upgrades of 'pro' applications are $49. Freak winces. Business smirks.

10:19 AM - Microsoft arrive. Five more years of Office for Apple. Ouch thinks Freak. Business almost perks up.

10:23 AM - Rosetta is a great bridge. Freak and Business look at each other and exchange a meaningful chuckle. Intel iMac looks to be faster.

10:26 AM - Intel iMacs are shipping already today. Oh wow, think both Business and Freak.

10:28 AM - 'One more thing'™. The MacBook Pro. 4-5 times faster than the PowerBook G5. These things are screamers. Specint from 6.7 to over 30, specfp leaps 4-5 times faster as well. 15.4 inch display. iSight.

10:35 AM - MagSafe. Power adapter is magnetically held in. If the cord gets yanked it pulls right off. Patent pending.

10:38 AM - MacBook Pro in February. $1999 for 1.67/512/80/4x SuperDrive, Airport Extreme. $2499 for faster 1.83 model with 1 GB RAM standard. One inch thin. 5.6 pounds. Backlit keyboard. Scrolling trackpad. Sudden motion sensor. If you want one I suggest you get your order in early.

'Did you see that?' asks Freak, all fired up but prepared for the worst.

'I didn't see anything', returns Business.