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FUD: More Windows-Centric Nonsense from Bill's Vassals

Snow Leopard's new Anti-Stupidity™ feature has the Windows security parasites terrified.

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Microsoft and their security vassals must be scared shitless. Bill was going to release his Windows Se7en in the Duck Pond on 22 October and fully expected Apple to release their own Snow Leopard a few weeks earlier in September - not enough to build any significant momentum. Then Apple go and pull the rug out from under him by releasing at the end of August.

And the worst of it? Snow Leopard's getting rave reviews. And in the two months until Windows Se7en hits the planet harder than A(H1N1) swine flu a lot of damage is going be done to Bill's crumbling empire.

And it's not just Bill sweating in his crack. The entire plugin Windows security cottage industry - those most noble of hard drug peddlers - are perspiring profusely in theirs. It must be bloody Niagara Falls back there.

Already two days after Intego were dragged to the guillotine they're back again - and they're picking up woodwork resident rodents like - George Hulme? Who the F is George Hulme? Exactly. George Hulme writes 205 word essays and invites everyone to visit him on Twitter to catch up on the latest in security and technology.

Thanks but no thanks. We'll be out hunting wild buffalo for the weekend. But thanks for the offer. Maybe next year.

Sophos are out too - with what is possibly the most ridiculous clip ever seen at YouTube. The point: their antivirus is faster than Apple's new Anti-Stupidity™? So you can catch dirty trick trojans half a millisecond faster than Apple can? Wow. But can they also catch bigger trojans like their own Sophos Antivirus Trojan Win32.SophosBullshit.X? For that's a trojan too: it sneaks onto systems and corrupts workflows and makes life miserable and expensive for you with no accruing benefits whatsoever.

Wise men say you should never wrestle a pig. The reason is simple and straightforward: whilst you might have a practical reason for wrestling, don't count on the pig having one. Pigs love to wrestle. It's their raison d'etre. And because they wrestle for the pure joy of wrestling, they'll wrestle you win or lose and they'll never give up. It's almost like pigs understand intuitively how annoying they can be. As if your frustration with them gives them an inner perverse satisfaction. But don't worry too much about it - it's never a good thing to worry too much about pigs (except their diseases). Just keep in mind that you and the pig enter into that wrestling match on widely disparate premises.

And if you don't believe that then catch these comments at the Sophos clip.

From now on, people cannot bash PC's for Virus's.
This is something which Apple is very fake with. They say in there commercials that Macs don't get Malware (Virus's)
So from this point on, Macs are equal to PC's in terms of Malware. HA
 - windowspczone

not quite equal - since pc has loads more.
but macs have always been open to virus' - just hackers didnt aim at macs because of the limited market share.
but as more people get macs it will be aimed at more.
from what i hear osx is just as vulnerable as windows.

Yes, but people can now realise that Macs are just the same as a PC, when it comes to Security.
As Mac fanboys have claimed that they are secure and don't ever get them. Because of the way Macs are.
Anyway, I think that OSX is actually more Vulnerable. I'll send you a Link
 - windowspczone

That's the demographic they're targeting. Admittedly one doesn't find people of that caliber outside the Microsoft Duck Pond so they can come as a shock. But they're out there - and they love pigs.

Anatomy of a FUD Campaign

Today's meagre offerings not only go farther and are more shameless than those of four days ago - they also expose their perpetrators as dumber than even the most cynical could unreasonably expect.

Or how about posting an article with a URL containing non-ASCII pretty quotes? It takes someone dramatically unfamiliar with the Internet and computer technology in general to use such feeble tools and to not understand the exigencies of what's going on. And yet that's precisely what the clowns at Intego did.


Their followup to their most recent fiasco is to provide a side by side comparison of Apple's Anti-Stupidity™ with their own antivirus trojan. Do they really not get it? That save for classics like windowspczone and MKCLLNS nobody really cares?

Whatever. George Hulme (of InformationWeak) immediately picked up the link in his latest Tolstoyesque 205 word essay. The task must have worn him out, having to think that deep and work that hard for so long.

Here's George's website BTW. He hasn't had time to do much with it yet - he's too busy writing sophisticated articles on security on the Internets and it's only been just over three years - and he still has to find someone who knows how to code the HTMLs.

In the meantime - try the spam links! You can find links to William Hulme, Waitrose Cheadle Hulme, Upper Hulme, Travelodge Manchester, Trafford Hall Hotel Manchester, Peter Hulme, Paul Hulme, Michael Hulme, and more. It's a cozy innocent world out there. What are you looking for anyway?

That Legendary Last Laugh

There's really not much to worry about anyway. Not unless you know windowspczone or MKCLLNS (or their parents or guardians) personally and really want to see them make something of their lives. For here's what it's all about in the context of the confrontation Bill's security charlatans are trying to lay out:

  • Windoze users are beset with hundreds of thousands of viruses they can never hope to fully get rid of. Hundreds of thousands. (One Microsoft employee who is probably on the chow line now quoted the number as 'close to a million'.) They can't reasonably expect to ever have virus-free systems. The most conscientious of them take one day a week just to run 'deep scans' on their systems. One day per week. Scans that take 18 hours or more.

  • Windoze users have to subscribe to multiple antivirus products to have even a sporting chance: statistically these antivirus products - peddled by the clowns mentioned above - can find at most about 60% of the crap hiding on a Windows system.

  • This FUD campaign - and the responses to it - are not about 'PC versus Mac'. Apple might use that tack in their fabulous 'Get a Mac' ads but the campaign's about so much more: it's about Windows versus literally anything else.

  • Windows users can't conceive of a platform that doesn't need antivirus. They can't conceive of a platform that stops black hats from infecting their systems in the first place. The only thing they know is Windows.

The Windows lusers like windowspczone and MKCLLNS will rush to purchase Windows Se7en for over $300, beef up their security again for hundreds more with layers of kevlar, rocket launchers, bazookas, and ground to air missiles, and then kid themselves they're OK. Let them - you get the last laugh as always.

Famous Words Again

Tell the purveyors of FUD where they can stuff it. Up their antivirus security holes.

Without Windows 'viruses' running rampant on the Internet, 'hacking' would be reduced to a few occasional pranksters and highly sophisticated contracted attacks. The ordinary user wouldn't have to think about (worry about, pay money for) computer security all the time.

That's where we all need to be. Do your thing and see we get there.

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